Hunter S. Thompson’s Lost Letter to Bush Found

 

Dear President Bush,

 

I’m afraid it’s become perfectly clear to me and a lot of other people that you’re wasting your time trying to communicate in a language you’ve never mastered and probably never will…especially now, in light of the new information we have on the republican IQ factor…and in trying to salvage your presidential “legacy’.

Most of the people who know you agree that your best chance of increasing your popularity now is to gracefully bow out in a quasi-Japanese method – perhaps by going on an all pretzel diet while watching tennis on TV. We know that you are incapable of swallowing and performing rapid eye movement at the same time, so the activity I described will work out best for all concerned, especially your family. If you happen to survive that, after leaving office, I recommend you live as anonymously as possible, in a Texas border town perhaps, doing what republicans do best in those regions — engaging in the buying and selling of children and snorting of crystal methamphetamine off hunting knives.

When the end comes, I hope you will show some decency by not being an organ donor. No one deserves any part of you lingering within them – who knows what might happen – your situation could be fucking contagious and should not be studied by scientists due to the potential error factor in cloning and whatnot. Better all traces of you be purged from this universe once and for all.

Ciao,

HST

Advertisements

5 responses to “Hunter S. Thompson’s Lost Letter to Bush Found

  1. thanks for that laugh.

  2. I wonder if he’s going to retire back to Texas. Before returning, he may want to spend some time with pop, develop a check-list, and ask him- “So, eight years…how’d I do?” 😉

  3. regardless of political persuasion, this post was a perfect example of what needs ‘changing’ in the national discussion. lighten up on the childish and immature tone. if you disagree, do so with honest, adult resoning and don’t try to make the other guy some kind of knuckle dragging buffoon. short message grow up and show some class even if you don’t think the ‘other guy’ has any.

  4. bushgirlsgonewild

    First of all, I’m not trying to have ‘a national discussion’. I’m making fun of the worst president this country has known, in the style Thompson used against Nixon, Agnew, and other crimminals. Second, after all of the problems the crimminal Bush and the Republicans have caused, and the fact that Bush is a complete moron, you want to berate me for pointing it out? Humor in the form of free speech is a weapon – and if you don’t understand that politics is war, you’re not as grown-up as you think you are. I’ll bet you wrote Tina Fey to complain about her skits on Sarah Palin too, didn’t you?

    “Dear Ms. Fey, regardless of the fact that I am probably a republican with a corncob so far shoved up my ass that my teeth are yellow, I think we all need to just get along because you’re making my candidate look like a fool even though you’re using the very words she spoke. Please grow up before you make me cry.”

    Run along, youngster.

  5. “Run along youngster,” too funny. You hit the nail on the head there. And thanks for posting the letter. It’s always fun to see the Doc lash out with words.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s